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[[selfishly enjoy yourself]]

[ even so | eternity ]
[ we become | absence ]
[ only | a fortuity ]

An open letter to Hershey's [Oct. 25th, 2011|03:45 pm]
allergrößte
[Tags|]

So I bought bags of candy with Reese's for Halloween, thinking I'd keep the Reese's and give out the rest. I had plenty of candy, but I wanted holiday Reese's, and there isn't a bag with just the pumpkins. But there were barely any Reese's in my bag. Few enough for me to count up all 61 of them.

I don't think 2 off is important. I mean, I'm pretty sure most foods are a few off the amount listed. But 63 is a weird number. I have no idea why you chose to put 63 pieces of candy in each bag. But I'm okay with only getting 61.

However, I'm not happy with the contents of the bag.

19 Milk Duds
21 Hershey's bars
7 York bats
8 Mr. Goodbar
6 Reese's

I paid $7 for this bag. That's like, over a dollar per Reese's pumpkin. But I bought 2 bags at once.

19 Milk Duds
23 Hershey's bars
7 York bats
4 Mr. Goodbar
10 Reese's

This one has more Reeses, and I'm sorta okay with that I guess. It's a bit better proportioned. What I don't get is why it's the top listed candy, the bag matches the colour scheme of the individual Reese's pumpkins wrappers, and why you insist on giving me so many Hershey's bars.

I'm going to be honest, your chocolate is horrible. It's unbelievably bad. I'd really consider eating mud shaped into bar form before eating a Hershey's bar. The smell alone literally makes me physically ill. For over 20 years, I thought I hated chocolate, but it was because most chocolate was Hershey's. However, the magical peanutty goodness inside Reese's is amazing enough to trump the ridiculously bad chocolate. And holiday Reese's seem to have less chocolate. I tend to buy several bags and eat them slowly until the next holiday, where I can get more Reeses with less chocolate. But, I can't find a bag of just Reese's pumpkins. And I want the bag with just Reese's pumpkins. But I got a 61 piece bag with 6 of them in it.  Why would you do that?
link2 nirvanic thoughts|are we flesh?

Vacation Time~ [Jul. 25th, 2011|10:22 am]
allergrößte
[Tags|]

I was going on vacation. And I went with Eric last time, but he thinks the world is his litterbox already, and the sand won't help that idea. So I looked around for a plushie, and Raiho seemed to be the most enthusiastic to go. So I took him. He scares me considerably less now though.



ready to hee-ve any time, ho~
hee-hee, lots of bad raiho talk ho~Collapse )
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WTF is this I don't even [Apr. 21st, 2011|11:19 pm]
allergrößte
[Tags|, , , , ]
[philosophical revolution |Home is the Best~]

And then, there were pics. And it was heavy.Collapse )
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Buy my Undead Boyfriend!! [Oct. 22nd, 2010|05:11 pm]
allergrößte
[Tags|]
[garden of paradise |Hell]
[philosophical revolution |[The Cure] A Forest]

So I'm selling my zombie boyfriend.

I think he used to be a mummy, but has some slight damage, and is pretty much a high end zombie now. So I'm selling him as a zombie. I've had him for about seven years, but he's considerably older than that.

Being that he was a mummy, he's kinda old, but he's really well preserved, save for the wrappings and whatnot. (They're missing. I'm not sure what happened to them, but they were already gone before I acquired him.) He's tall (about 6'7" I think), thin, with black hair and blue eyes. I'm fairly certain this is his original colour scheme. He comes with a set of brown contacts, and I guess you could bleach and dye his hair if you don't like the black. He also has an English accent. I don't think you can get rid of that. He has minimal rotting of flesh, since he's been well preserved, being a mummy and all. He's very good looking, for being a zombie and all.

He DOES smoke alot, and that's really not a fixable problem. So don't buy this zombie if smoking bothers you. He has some notable liver damage, and I advise the buyer to not give him alcohol. (I don't know if this is a pre-undeath problem.) He does buy the cigarettes himself, so we assume he still has some of his mummy treasure. We've never asked about that though, since they're probably cursed. He also prefers live food, and isn't very willing to each much else.


Why am I getting rid of my zombie boyfriend? Well, we get along really well, and he's really pretty, but zombies aren't good for conversation. Also, he only wants me for my brains. :(

I'm willing to negotiate payment, and I'll also consider a trade. I'd like something of vampire or higher mortality though, I don't really want another zombie. No werewolves, too hairy. Will consider robots.

Inquiries should leave a comment, or message allegoriest on aim, and ask for Leene or Siegfried.

Attached Image:

(Artist's [sic] Interpretation)
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This post is brought to you by breasteses and Seth W. [Oct. 15th, 2010|06:50 pm]
allergrößte
[Tags|, ]

I have taken my nipples for granted far too long. (Seth W.- I haven't.)

Just fyi, my nipples are fabulous. Chances are, you probably haven't seen them, but I assure you, they are. (Seth W.- Yes, they are.)

If my nipples ever inverted, I don't know what I'd do.

Being that I'm batshit insane, I'd probably consider removal. However, then I'd have scars. The only obvious solution would be tattoos or piercings. I'd probably just get blobs or something where my nipples once were. Then maybe just random piercings through the then flattened skin. (Seth W.- Ooh, we can match!)

...Obviously, I'm terrified of nipple change.

Goddamn fucking terrified.

I'm sorry for all the horrible things I've done to you, nipples. All the bleeding and the chemical burns. I'm so fucking sorry. And I wish I could take all of it back.


Also, I have the amphibians. Froggies and a salamamander. And I think I have two decent setups. The froggies, Kerochan and Keropon, love theirs, and are trying to have babies to enjoy it with them. That displeases me. Eduardo is mad that I moved his house and he is just staring at me all I HATE YOU.  He secretly likes it though. I know he's been using it all when he's not looking since he's made such a mess and hasn't been hiding in the water.

But that's okay. Since he hasn't ever given me salmonella. (Seth W.- Wait, you had salmonella?)

Unlike the froggies.

Salmonella hoarding bastards.

They're lucky they're goddamn adorable. (Seth W.- Oh yeah. Now I remember.)
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BEHOLD, EDUARDAUX. [Sep. 9th, 2010|02:53 pm]
allergrößte
[Tags|]
[philosophical revolution |[Despair Girls] Gouin ni Mai Yeah]

I have never introduced Eduardaux (Think Eduardo but FAKE), my awkward Latino roommate.

We thought he was a Mexican. Then we realised not only could I see him (I can't see Mexicans. I don't remember why, but I can't.), but he just doesn't look right.

Then I noticed, Eduardaux had gills AND nostrils. Kinda weird. And he assumedly has lungs, cause he breathes air and makes bubbles through his nostrils. But he uses his gills too, or can hold his breathe for an hour. Very suspicious.

Eduardaux always liked digging holes, but suddenly, he became REALLY buff. I don't think digging holes in sand does that. Also, he likes to walk more than he likes to swim.

His eyes are starting to bulge out more, and I suspect he can see alot better, since now he just STARES at me. However, he also likes to ignore me when I want the attention. His dawww smile changed to a hee hee hee suspicious smile, and that also worries me.

Then his lovely olive skin started getting splotches of black and white. And his golden eyes look kinda bluish.



Then I realized, OH MY GOD, HE'S EVOLVING. YOU LITTLE FAKE.

Of course, this mean's he some kinda of mutant. ...Or he REALLY likes swimming. For the longest time he was some kind of half evolved monstrosity, but now he seems to have decided he does indeed want a new body. (Which SADDENS me. But hes growing up~ <3) Despite being, you know, full grown.


Things Eduardaux likes:
Eating
Swimming
Eating
Chillin
Eating
Eating
Digging Holes
Eating

Things Eduardaux doesn't like:
Light
Not eating
The idea of getting a job at BAMC

I have built him his own island. ...It's a very small island. But an island none of the less!! He likes to sleep next to me, and really likes hiding in the shadow of my pillows. When I sit facing a direction, he does it too. It's adorable. <3

I sitll wonder if he's actually gonna go through with this evolving business. Cause he's been avoiding it like the plague. Its been making him kinda bipolar too.

In the strange event that Eduardaux is a chick, she shall be named Auxusena. ...Hopefully, we can come up with a better name, since that one is already taken. He almost ended up as Federicaux, which I liked better, but it was kinda awkward. I was pressued into Eduardo. But he's a little FAKE so he's Eduardaux. (Actually, I wanted to name him Shintoku... but... that's a bad name. D:  )
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Writer's Block: What's my motivation? [Aug. 29th, 2010|09:32 am]
allergrößte
[Tags|]

If you could replace any actor/actress in a film with someone else, who would you replace, and why?

Everyone with Matt Bomer.

Everyone.
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Why yes Pulparindo, I LOVE tamarind shells! Thankyou for including so many!! [Aug. 29th, 2010|04:03 am]
allergrößte
House on bluray OMG.
I'm so exicted.
(No, not that House. The awesome House.)
...I'll still probably get DVD though, won't I? Hmm.


I'd like to tell you about Axauxlotl. For all purposes, he's an axolotl. But he's about to evoooolve~ He eats worms and lives next to my bed. He's SO CUTE. And voracious. (He is a bottomless pit. Then later, he realises he ate SO MUCH its rotting inside him, and he pukes. BAD AXAUXLOTL.) He likes worms.

Which I'm deathly allergic to! And we had no idea. I had an UNGODLY allergic reaction involving burning and hives and OH SWEET JESUS WHY to the point that its a really bad thing I still haven't picked up an epipen.

So, I'm going to harvest worms. I'm thinking earthworms. My baby will want them someday. Daww he's so cute. However, I'm pretty sure after so much worming, I'm going to be insane and hate worms and my baby will go hungry. This is a dilemma. I need a worm supplier.

AH. AH. AH HA AHAHA
AH. AH. AH HA AHAHA
AH. AH. AH HA AHAHA
AH. AH. AH HA AHAHA

State Farm spokeman is trying to make me be not-asexual. This displeases me. Solution: Change channel.

Oh god, nothing's on. Wtf, I have like ten thousand channels and everything sucks. Solution: Try non English channels.

GOD DAMMIT, HE MAKES COMMERCIALS IN SPANISH TOO WHAT THE HELL. Solution: Find him, steal him, and keep him as a bodyguard to save me from old hispanic ladies.

...Obviously, my process is at a current halt. Also, I'm apparently the only living soul who likes the State Farm man. Of course, I AM thinking about growing worms, so my opinion prooobably doesn't count. D: Also, I'm not changing my insurance. CURSE YOU EDDIE MATOS. (It took me a LONG time to find that name. A long time I say.)
Also, every old Mexican lady is out to harvest my soul. Except for the even creepier ones who neeed to be near me. They actually scare me more.

Meanwhile, I think I have a Mercedes again. However, this is against my agreement to exist, so, now to get rid of it. Hmm. This is always awkward.


I've been playing Uso Megami Tensei: Animation Summoner: Raidou Kuzunoha VS the Infernal Bleeping Noise.
Eventually, I defeated the bleeping noise, but then the fucking Chupacabra was trying to eat my goats. That fucker. Now he wants to be my friend, and I'm like fuck you, you're the god forsaken chupacabra. Also, he tried to screw with my BFF. Don't think so, goat sucker.


NAAA NA NA NANANANA NA NANA NA

I hate my new phone. I've had it over the summer and it drives me insane. Stupid touchy feely electronics.

I also have a puppy now apparently. ALL HAIL THE ALMIGHTY COCKSHUND. She's getting big. And blonde.

[NOTHING TO SEE HERE.]


I also certainly hope Jeannie had tapioca with her dinner tonight.
link2 nirvanic thoughts|are we flesh?

An open letter to Carino's. [Aug. 23rd, 2010|09:30 pm]
allergrößte
[dread curiosity |GOD DAMN TOMATO PIZZA]

Served me a freakin tomato pizza.
Why in gods name would I want tomatoes with tomatoes on badly made crust?



Recently, I went to one of your restaurants and had the pleasure of eating a tomato pizza, which was for some reason called a margherita pizza. (I never figured out why since it was essentially ALL tomato.) The first pizza I had was horribly burnt and sent back for one that was very unevenly cooked. It had very little cheese, most the basil was burnt and blew away. With the combined tomatoes of the great amounts of sauce and toppings, it was a tomato pizza. Every single bite, filled with the taste of bland, unevenly cooked tomato. An entire plate of tomato. (I was there for quite a while. And the table bread wasn't completely done either. I was very hungry. I didn't want to eat the tomato. But I was with a recovering anorexic, and I had to eat. She had no complaints, but really, she's never eaten actual food.)
I'm fairly certain I've had this pizza at the same place before, but I do not ever recall eating a tomato pizza in my life. What happened?

Now, I probably like tomatoes alot more than the next guy. Sweet tomatoes, savoury tomatoes. They're pretty delicious. But not when they're sorta-maybe cooked and just bland. And paired with more tomatoes.

One of my companions had some type of five meat pasta, which reminded her of her food at work. (She works at a hospital you see...) She could only describe it as 'gooey,' and I'm not entirely sure what that means, but I'm fairly certain that food shouldn't be 'gooey.' I don't think 'gooey' is a flavour, but she insists it is. (It really did look terrifying.)

After we went home, I also got some type of food poisoning, which makes no sense because all I ate was tomatoes.

The waiter was very good though. His name was Patrick. He even wrote a little thankyou on the receipt. (He has very nice handwriting too.)

You need to make your chefs eat their pizza. Specifically, your Saturday lunch to early afternoon chefs. Have they ever eaten a tomato pizza made of burnt, or goo with five different meats? It's very unpleasant.




Yeah, I actually sent this to them btw.
link2 nirvanic thoughts|are we flesh?

(no subject) [Aug. 14th, 2010|04:57 am]
allergrößte
[garden of paradise |a ship of fools]
[philosophical revolution |Departure]

Ah. Ha. Ah ha ahaha.
Ah. Ha. Ah ha ahaha.
Ah. Ha. Ah ha ahaha.
Ah. Ha. Ah ha ahaha.
Ah. Ha. Ah ha ahaha.

Ah. Ha. Ah ha ahaha.
Ah. Ha. Ah ha ahaha.
Ah. Ha. Ah ha ahaha.
Ah. Ha. Ah ha ahaha.
Ah. Ahaha aha.
Ah. Ahaha aha.

Ha. Aha ha haha.

Ah. Ha. Ah ha ahaha.
Ah. Ha. Ah ha ahaha.
Ah. Ha. Ah ha ahaha.
Ah. Ha. Ah ha ahaha.
Ah. Ha. Ah ha ahaha.
Ah. Ha. Ah ha ahaha.
Ah. Ha. Ah ha ahaha.
Ah. Ha. Ah ha ahaha.
Ah. Ha. Ah ha ahaha.
Ah. Ha. Ah ha ahaha....
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